7

PERSONALITY STABILITY, DEVELOPMENT, AND CHANGE

“The more things change, the more they stay the same”¹

—JEAN-BAPTISTE ALPHONSE KARR

YOU ARE NOT EXACTLY the same as you were five years ago, and you will almost certainly be at least somewhat different five years from now. Yet you will still feel like—and you will be—the same person. The paradox between these two facts lies at the core of the study of personality development. People change their personalities throughout their lives, sometimes in response to dramatic events and sometimes seemingly just because of the passage of time. Yet fundamental traits remain consistent. Indeed, changing personality, on purpose, is difficult. But it’s not impossible, as we shall see.

The present chapter begins with a survey of the evidence concerning the stability of personality, the traits that remain relatively unchanged across decades. Notice I said “relatively” unchanged. Relatively tall children tend to become relatively tall adults, even though they and their shorter friends are both growing. Similarly, differences in personality generally are consistent over time, even while everybody is changing from adolescents to adults to senior citizens. Addressing this point, the second part of the chapter summarizes how personality changes systematically, or “develops” across the life span. In most cases, personality becomes both more stable and more “mature” (we will consider what this means) as the individual gets older. Finally, the chapter considers the possibilities for personality change. If you want to affect the way someone’s personality develops—or if you want to change your own personality—is this possible? If so, how? And, on balance, is personality change a good thing or bad?